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Absinthetic.com is a corner of the internet of Ken Gonzales, a Computer Sciences undergrad at the British Columbia Institute of Technology living in Vancouver, BC. He listens to Kevin Smith’s SModcast network, blogs infrequently, cheers on the Vancouver Canucks and has a job in helping other people with their PHP, CSS, SQL and all those other fun web programming technologies.

Also, he is tall.

This web site is more to log all the mundane things that go on in his life to look back on.  You will find pictures, blogs post, & other stuff that interests him & his views on current events on this site.  Even maybe some politics thrown in.  You know, the dubious, politically incorrect and mainly humorous musings.

So, this site isn’t really for anyone in particulars.  Its a personal site in its truest sense.

But, since you’re already here, take a look around.

Oh, and if you live in Vancouver & need help when you’re computer is not co-operating, needs repairs, or dont know how install or reinstall your computers Operating system, drop him a line.  As a freelance web site designer & developer, he can also help build your web site as well.

About Me

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally I tread water for three days in a row.

I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed and I cook thirty-minute Brownies in twenty minutes.  I am an expert in Stucco, a veteran in love and an outlaw in Peru.

Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single handedly defended a small village in the Amazon basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello. I was scouted by the Braves. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I am bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don’t perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and I have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal force demonstration. I bat .400. My floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room set. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.

I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic and my bills are paid. On weekends to let off steam, I participate in full contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only mold and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet. I have performed open heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

Not really, but its a close approximation